On Saturday night after quiet time with Abba, He told me I had to go to church the following morning for service because He had something to tell me and teach me over there. I hadn’t been to my local church in about 3 weeks because I’ve been spending most of my time watching online sermons, but this time around I felt so led to go.
Abba kept putting it in my head to go to church, but I felt so reluctant about it. After cutting off my alarm a multiple times, I eventually got up for the 10:45 am service because I truly believed Abba had something to tell me.
Anyway, still feeling quite sleepy, I got dressed and drove over to the church. I was happy to be there and join in the praises, but for some odd reason, I kept bursting out in tongues each second.
The awkwardness begins
Then finally when the preaching began, I just couldn’t sit comfortably in the service. The message I was receiving wasn’t sitting right with my spirit and each scripture that was discussed seemed so off meaning. I kept asking Abba “why am I feeling so uncomfortable?” –but He told me to just keep listening.
The last time I went to church which was about 3 weeks prior, I didn’t have this experience, so why was this happening now?
I struggled so much to sit still and listen to the preacher without bursting in tongues each minute and having so many thoughts go through my head. My spirit wasn’t sitting right with the message and it was so bad that I couldn’t even take proper notes like I normally would.
Basically, the gospel was so watered down that I couldn’t even believe that I had been attending this church for a while. I felt dumbfounded and amazed. It’s like my eyes were opened to the truth and all I was hearing wasn’t just sitting right with me.
Either way, I kept asking Abba, what are you trying to teach me? What did you bring me here to learn? I’m so confused!
Nothing was making sense and it felt like a wasted effort waking up and coming to learn nothing. But either way, I just calmed myself down and waited until the service was over.
More and More questions
When I finally got out of service, I asked Abba, what did you bring me here to learn? I don’t want to sound judgy, but my spirit doesn’t sit right with the minister and I don’t know why.
Then Abba started to answer me, and all I remember Him saying was discernment. “I’m teaching you discernment. You see not everyone who preaches in my name is of me.” And honestly, that made me super sad.
A church I had been attending for ages suddenly turned out to be the opposite of what I thought it was because Abba had finally given me discernment.
It’s so so sad to see how the gospel has been so watered down. Preachers these days are watering down the gospel to suit worldly standards, which is the complete opposite of what Abba would want.
Even the bible says it. You can’t serve two masters, it’s either you love one and hate the other (Matthew 6:24)
Discernment is Key
This experience showed me how far on my journey I’ve come and how much intimacy I’ve gotten with Father. I’m so grateful for this. Not that I know better (because I don’t know it all), But instead, I now know if someone is speaking from the Spirit of God or not, which that in itself is a gift. I’m so grateful for this journey because I’m learning so much by the day and Abba is pruning me along the way.